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Black Adventist Men and dating
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New!
JUL-28-07
21:56:23
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Forum: Serious Discussion for Christian Singles
RE: Black Adventist Men and dating
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Submitted Anonymously
Female
61-70
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You made me laugh about your buddy that truthfully calls himself African American because he is from Africa. The pastor that spoke at my dad's funeral is also "African American" as you said, from South Africa. He is VERY white, freckled, with bright red hair. His South African accent is delightful.
A family from Brazil moved in near me. They invited my son & me to dinner right after "9/11". They asked me for help in understanding the racial bias in the USofA. They said that such was not true in Brazil. The husband said he has a blond parent & a black parent. He actually looks like the stereotype of "middle eastern". He said he had felt rather nervous about his looks because if he just had on a turban he would look like what quite a few people at that time suspected as a "terrorist".
Children do not have a racial bias. It comes from their experiences. When my 2 oldest children were ages 5 & 6, a neighbor visiting said something about "that black woman that visits you". After she left, the children asked me who she had been talking about, because the only black person they could think of was J.... . (a black as a black crayon friend). I said she was talking about L.... They said "L... isn't black! Daddy is brown. L... isn't black!" (L... is very light & has freckles) (Daddy had a tan from outdoors). New concept. Several years later I found out that my youngest son was terrified of dark skinned people! Why? At a young age he had seen on TV, during the riots in Los Angeles, TV showing over & over black men beating a blond trucker. I hadn't realised how that had impacted him. He hadn't even seen it very many times.
Although I am a "white" causasian I happen to be physically attacted to men who's skin is a lot darker than mine & that have black, nearly straight hair. I do NOT like light blue eyes or light blond hair. But that shows my preference & attraction. A man that looks like that may be from a culture that is extremely different from mine. The blond may have much more similiar beliefs, hobbies, & likes that would make us be more compatible. A "black" man might be best, but not the ones that are so predjudiced against all "whites" (I've also run into a couple of those.)
Right now there lives next door a young man that is "black", also very dark, & is from England. He is SO VERY different in his attitudes than the "black" girl from NY city that used to live next door. He is a PERSON. She had a very different ATTITUDE.
We are all part of God's family. Some cultures won't mix as easily with certain other cultures. I do wish everyone would just consider all people as PEOPLE instead of black, white, or whatever physical characteristics they have. There really is no diference there. Seems to me that most of us probably would get along more easily with someone with a background of culture rather similiar to our own, but that may not be what attracts us, either.
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New!
JAN-18-07
6:1:32
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Forum: Serious Discussion for Christian Singles
RE: Black Adventist Men and dating
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Submitted Anonymously
Male
51-60
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Racism is defined as the ability of one group to imposes their will upon another. There are to types of racist willing and unwilling. Caucasions and those like them fall into one of those catagories. A black man can not be a racist,but prejudice, bigot yes. He does not possess the power to impose his will on white people.
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New!
JAN-16-07
23:43:26
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Forum: Serious Discussion for Christian Singles
RE: Black Adventist Men and dating
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Mezzosongbird
Female
31-40
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I am not sure if I would question if he is racist or not as much as I would question if he was about playing games. You dated for a year and a half. It took him that long to realize that he wanted a woman of his own race? What was he really up to? That's my question.
As for you being labeled racist for wanting a man of your own race, who would call you racist? People often want people of their own race. This is not racist. There is common ground within one's race. I, myself, am willing to date people of any race. In some ways, I think that people use the term 'racist' loosely. Wanting someone with similar background is not racist. Racist is define by dictionary.com as "a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others." Wanting to be with someone from your own race does not seem to fit the dictionary definition. It does not automatically include believing that your race is superior or that you have a desire to rule others. It usually stems from a desire to be with like minded individuals. So, to those who would call you racist, they are ignorant of the meaning of the word. Be proud to be yourself and choose whom you feel comfortable to be with, while allowing God to guide you.
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New!
JAN-15-07
18:2:59
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Forum: Serious Discussion for Christian Singles
RE: Black Adventist Men and dating
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Ms112701
Female
41-50
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I have a new question relating to dating between races. For about a year and a half, almost two years, I sporadically dated an African American gentleman. We have similar values and beliefs on basic things in life, although we are different denominations. Recently he informed me that he wants a woman of his own race. Here's what I don't understand, as a white woman, if I had stated that I wanted a man of my race, I would be instantly labeled a racist. How is it that he can make such a statement and claim that he is not racist?
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New!
JAN-8-07
11:50:37
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Forum: Serious Discussion for Christian Singles
RE: Black Adventist Men and dating
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tangosolo
Female
51-60
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In response to Braslimay,
Well, I think every parent need to have a talk with their child about racism...
It is a hideous evil...
I had the talk with my boys and I am very glad I did, because no one will have done that as far as I know.
My son have been blessed by it, as he is a minister now and he have that
cleared out early in childhood.
We are all precious in God's site, a christian will approach this matter
as Christ will.
This little note is for a brother that have misunderstood me and blocked me, I am sorry that some one hurt you, but I have no intension of hurting you, I am fond of color people as I growed up in Brazil and
loved all the people God put in my path... Most of them were color people.
Silvia
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